DIY Capiz Chandelier: The Little Light That Could

Being a first time home buyer, I made the HUGE mistake of impulse buying. Instead of taking my time to decide on what I really want, I just went with what I thought was cool...at that moment. Hence, the lighting downstairs that I've grown to loathe. There is nothing wrong with the lights per say, they are just not at all near what I want. For months now I have obsessed about getting a new light for the dining room. Since I have an open floor plan you can see the dining room from the kitchen and living room which means I see that light ALL THE TIME!

A few months ago I told T I wanted new lights. Since he originally told me to take my time to decide and I still impulse bought, he wasn't exactly thrilled at the idea of getting new lights. I kept putting the new dining room light on the back burner month after month. I tried to see his side. They worked and there wasn't anything wrong with them. Eventually I couldn't take it anymore so basically said we're getting a new light, period. After searching and searching and doing my best to combine our styles, I found this one from West Elm.

I loved the light and T actually didn't hate it! SCORE! Well, until he saw the price, a hefty $269. Yeah, didn't like the light anymore. I can't say that I blame him, $269 for a light seems a bit steep. Yes, it is gorgeous and I would have loved to have it in my home, but not for $269 bells. I was just about defeated when I turned to my best friend, Pinterest and found this tutorial. It didn't look too hard so I figured I would tackle it and not to mention if it worked, I would save over $200!! So I got my supplies!

Circle cutter, check. A wreath frame spray painted white, check. Wax paper faux shells, check. I'll be honest with you, ironing the wax paper and actually cutting out the shells was a serious pain in my ass! My OCD side wanted to iron out every little air bubble, but you can't. The air bubbles and imperfections are what makes each "shell" unique like real ones. Cutting the shells was definitely a trial and error process. The tutorial I found said 2 inches, but that just seemed way too big for my taste so I tried a bunch of different sizes. 1.5 inches ended up being my winner.

Making the strand of shells was also a bit of trial and error process. I messed around with spacing and overlapping and butting them one against another before I decided on a slight overlap. It's definitely a personal preference. Since you can somewhat see the hot glue through the "shells," I wanted the overlap to help hide that. It does work. Attaching the strand of shells to the metal frame about made me throw the towel in on this project. I wanted to hot glue them to the metal, but hot glue doesn't exactly cling to metal very well. I got about three strands in before the first one fell off. I quickly realized I needed a more sturdy option so I opted to leave my fishing wire long at the top so I can tie them to the frame. That works MUCH better.

I would love to say that I'm done with this project, but I'm not. In fact, I'm no where near close to done, yet I'm determined to finish this. It's taking me longer just because of the size of my light. I'm sure if I went smaller it would go a lot faster and if I wasn't so OCD about it, but I would rather do it right the first time. I'm not sure if I love it quite yet, but it's definitely starting to take shape. Stay tuned!

Doc Appointment Update

Met with my OB today and let me just say, I LOVE her!! She's straight to the point, but really sweet so it's just awesome.

Anyhow, this is the low down. She's not 100% convinced that I have LPD. She thinks my body is still getting adjusted, but to help ease my mind and to not chance it, we're doing CD21 testing on my progesterone to see where it's at. Obviously if the numbers come back too low or whatever, she will adjust and go from there. As it stands though, we are no longer on a hold. So We could totally go this cycle if we wanted to!

That brings me to the question over whether we are going to go for it....or wait. Today....we wait. I know, I know, we're BSC! I've been waiting for this for months now, but we have other things that are possibly on the horizon that are too good to pass up, like drinking at a pub in Ireland! We have talked and talked and talked about taking a big trip over to Ireland and Scotland, but haven't done it. Somehow last night we decided that dammit we want to go and dammit we are. So we are working with an escorted tour company on a possible trip in March, 2012. If we do decide to go, we will push TTCAL off until January/February. If it seems too out of reach or we change our minds, then we do that.

Either way, I'm VERY relieved by my appointment today and are in an awesome mood. My doc has eased my mind and I am really getting confident that I WILL be a mom someday. I'm a little tense waiting for the pap results, due to my previous pap issues of abnormal paps, colposcopies, cryotherapy and cold knife conization, but hey, who's keeping track?

One Post....A LOT To Say

#1: Onto Cycle 5

Check that out! 11 days!!! I had an 11 day LP this month!!! I am THRILLED about this. Sure, it's not fabulous by any means, but to someone who's average LP is 8.3 days this is HUGE. There isn't anything else to say. Beautiful!

#2: T Got Promoted!
Gotta be a bragger for a second. T got promoted!! He is now a Sergeant and I am so proud of him. Today we actually went and bought all his new uniforms (he was in Detectives when they changed so he never got them) and his new outer carry vest. It was a bit of an investment :cough, $850, cough:, but worth it because I'm all about his comfort for work and more importantly his safety. If he's comfortable he can move around easier and not to mention the outer carry vest will replace his belt and his vest that he used to wear under his uniforms. So, there is NO chance he can sneak out of the house without it! Booyeah!

#3: Doctor's Appointment This Week!!!!
Thursday is my doctor's appointment. We have a lot to cover. My well woman (oh joy) and my LP issues. Even though my LP was longer this month, my average is still too low so we'll see what she wants to do. I'm not going to try to guess because I don't want to get my hopes up for one thing to have her do another. The point is by the end of this week we could actually have a game plan.

#4: 5 Months.
Today marks 5 months since our beautiful Spawn grew wings. It's hard. I still get teary eyed and a lump in my throat, but I'm doing better. I try not to think about where I should be right now and focus on where I am. With every month that goes by it gets a little easier and hurts a little less, but I don't think it will ever not hurt. No matter how many kids I do go on to have one thing will remain the same, I have one in heaven and that child cannot be replaced.

That's the hard thing to get people to understand about pregnancy loss, especially early loss. People think "oh well you can just get pregnant again." No, it's not like that. You can't replace the child you lost. Like your kids, each one is different and unique and I will never get to know that child. I will never know if s/he had my lips or T's eyes. I will never get to know if s/he likes to read like me or prefers to game like daddy. I never had the chance to find these little quirks out that make that child unique. No child can be replaced. Yes, I will have future children, but Spawn will ALWAYS hold a special place in my heart and no amount of time is going to change that.

I am hoping this marks a turning point for us. Our year from hell appears to be turning around and by the end of this year we could have wonderful news to share. Spawn, know one thing will never change, your mommy and daddy love you, to the moon and back.

7DPO & Babblings...

Well, currently 7DPO on TTA cycle #4 (and hopefully our last!) I'm not even going to hold my breath for a longer LP. I'm over trying to be hopeful. I've come to terms with my issue and have faith that my doctor will have a good game plan. Even if she tells us to avoid the next cycle for testing I will be happy. I just want a game plan and not be stuck in this never ending wait.

I used my new OPK's this month and they worked really nicely which was awesome! They were easy to use and to read which is a plus. I actually bought them in bulk on Amazon (yep, I buy them in lots of 50 now). Why do I buy so many? Well because I test 3x a day over the course of 5-7 days depending on the cycle. Obviously that starts to add up. Why do I test so much? Well, because if you don't pay close attention you CAN miss it. See CD17, am had a clear negative, pm had a very clear positive!

Alright, enough with ovulation, tests and doctor mumbo jumbo. T and I are starting work on the home which is awesome (and a long time coming). This weekend we will be buying paint to start edging and painting downstairs. Then I will start my DIY light project for above the stairs. Currently I'm rocking an awesome white 1960's light that looks way outdated. I want a more modern, but classic light. One that is neutral without being overly gaudy (T hates crystal lights). So on my mission I found this GORGEOUS light!

The price, not so much! Thankfully, I found this awesome tutorial that I will be trying. Hopefully I don't go up in flames! I'll be sure to post my results, good or bad.

No Good Reason...

I know I’ve been slacking on the blog front and it’s not because I don’t care, it’s because I literally have nothing interesting to blog about. Right now we’re in this holding pattern waiting to see the doc and I can only blog about those feelings so many times. It’s a broken record really.

Right now T and I are focusing on a few other things. First and foremost, painting our house. We still have the sterile white walls that were painted before we moved in. I hate white. T loves white. It’s been fun honestly. So after fight after fight about color, we opted to choose a lack of color if you will, gray. Then of course, that started another never ending cycle of arguments because we couldn’t agree on a shade. [The day T and I agree on stuff will definitely signal the apocalypse.] So we both picked one that we liked and one that was in between. We got the three samples from Home Depot and painted them little bad boys on our wall. In an effort to try to be fair, I facebooked a picture. I wanted non-biased opinions on which color was better and I even made sure not to note who liked what. We both lost. Everyone chose the in between color. So that’s our winner.

Aside from paint, I am focusing on other house stuff. Moving stuff around, adding some knick knacks. I think I’m just trying to keep my mind off the whole situation. It’s working too. I am now obsessing over paint colors and floor samples instead of my cycles. I’m doing massive research about DIY projects and not about babies. It’s been a nice break to be honest. I’ve been so hard wired about this baby thing that I completely forgot to think about anything other than it. I hate to admit it, but I totally became that woman who obsesses about babies and getting pregnant. Don’t get me wrong, I still absolutely want that more than anything, but I also need to try to accept the fact that it may not work that way. I may get pregnant again and have no problems. I may get pregnant again and not be able to carry. I have absolutely no control over this and I think I’ve finally accepted that. All I can really do is give it my best effort by getting healthy and tracking my cycles, but pretty much 90% is out of my hands.

Emotionally, I’m in a better place. I’ve cried, believe me. I’ve cried countless times and there have been some really dark places, but recently, I’ve just moved forward. There wasn’t really any sort of huge moment that changed my mind. I think I just finally realized that by focusing so much on what I don’t have, I’m not giving any attention to the stuff I do have. I have a wonderful husband. A beautiful home. Two crazy wonderful dogs. A cat that drives me batty, but wouldn’t change her anyway. A good job that I actually like. A great family that also drives me batty, but I wouldn’t want them any other way. Friends that make me giggle and smile.

When I actually take a step back and look at all the wonderful things and people I do have in my life, I wouldn’t want it to be any different.