Got my test results from my doc's office today, my progesterone is low. While I wasn't shocked, actually hearing it still stung. I was secretly hoping they would call me and tell me I'm a hypochondriac and I was fine, but they didn't. So now we wait...longer. They are doing a repeat again this cycle to see where the numbers come back and we'll go from there. T and I will be avoiding during this time which doesn't exactly thrill me, but it is what it is. I'm going to try to find something to focus on during this time to keep me distracted which will be next to impossible since my sis is having my nephew in just over 2 weeks. I'm so thrilled for her, but I'll be honest and say I'm so green eyed with jealousy right now it's not even funny. I try to keep that irrational side calm, but it's hard, like today's breakdown. Yeah, totally did the crying "why me" with T tonight. Like a good hubby he stood and smiled and let me vent. Of course he has to remind me that it's not as bad in reality like it is in my head which usually just pisses me off more, but that's only because he's right. In the grand scheme of things waiting 30 or so more days isn't that bad and provided it leads to the ultimate goal of having a successful pregnancy and child.
So my goal is to set some goals for this time frame to keep me from passing over to the completely irrational side permanently. I'm going to try to be realistic (haha) and focus on getting healthier and doing some more stuff around this house. Or I could just focus on not driving my husband absolutely BSC over the next 30 days, but that's like next to impossible so not sure it's the best goal for me to set. We'll see. Hopefully tomorrow I will wake up and not be so damn pessimistic and depressing.
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