It's not.
Thankfully the tech was the same tech as Friday so I don't think she was offended by my response.
Tech: [sigh] Still there.
Me: You've got to be fucking kidding me.
She understood my frustration. Offspring is right there. As in right by my cervix. Still. Apparently my body just doesn't want to let this little one go. Which would be fine if my little one was still with us. But s/he isn't and I'm just ready to move forward with my life at this point.
We're on to plan b now which is a D&C on Friday. I have mixed feelings about it. I really didn't want to go this route, but on the other hand I'm ready for this to be over. My last m/c was a walk in the park physically compared to this. It was like 4 hours of intense pain, but then I was able to start on the emotional healing. This time, it feels like there is no end. My m/c started at 2 am on Friday and as of today my uterus STILL isn't empty. I'm still cramping, but not enough to push this along.
The only silver lining in today was when the tech walked out she left up the picture she took of Offspring. My gut told me to just take a picture of the sonogram for later. That someday I'll look back and be grateful to have that pic of our little one, even if it was after our precious Offspring's heart stopped beating. Not even 12 hours later and I'm already glad I did it. It's hard to see Offspring because of where s/he is located, but s/he is definitely there. S/he is located directly below the broken heart. Fitting because that's exactly how I feel.
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